Friendships Multiplied

Friends are an indispensable part of a meaningful life. They are the ones who share our burdens and multiply our blessings. A true friend sticks by us in our joys and sorrows. In good times and bad, we need friends who will pray for us, listen to us, and lend a comforting hand and an understanding ear when needed. ~ Beverly LaHaye

When something is rooted in loss, it can spring forth a stem of growth, surpassing in release. 

While my bereavement lead me to Judy, our friendship over the last few years, has seen the measure of our bonds form its own cherished union.

I have spent many celebrations and remembrances with her. We have giggled and snorted over our experiences with ceremonial wrapping, only because of our unintentional discovery of such a practice. Death either makes people nervous with fright or giddy with nerves. In sharing about our daughters, we agree their sense of humours linger on. 

On my previous blog, The Heart Pebble Movement, there is a more in-depth recollection of how Judy and I met. 

This posting is dedicated to what the bond of a true friendship entails. It is the essence of how someone comes into your world and changes it forever.

When I sit in my prayer room, I think about the differences --- whether big or small--- that Judy has made in my life. 

No matter what, 9 times out of 10, if I call her…Judy is at the other end of the receiver patiently listening to my endless tales. Her text messages always contain: “Are you okay?” Or “Can I do anything for you?”

If I am down, she is there to crack a joke so absurd, only I would get it.

Her care-free attitude offers reassurance; to be glad in life and allow myself to love again, to trust again, to just be who I am. 

The marvel in all of this is that Judy has struggled, endured and survived in a world not always keen on acceptance.

She has frequently gone beyond the realm of friendship and brightens my corner of the world, with her generous heart. For Valentine’s Day, I received a beautiful mug that has seen many of my English tea steeped in it. 

As I pack up my belongings, there are note cards of sentiments, which are filled with her compassion. A dragonfly ornament and earrings to match are amongst the gifts she has blessed me with. While I treasure all of this, it is the unyielding love and concern for me, which I value in our friendship. 

This week has been challenging, trying to secure work and pack my life up, once again. A few nights ago, I called Judy in tears and was vocal about how unfair it was that I had to re-sort and pack up my daughter’s belongings. It’s like an invisible band-aid is ripped off repeatedly and I am left sobbing over remnants of the past. If there is one person who understands this remorse, it is Judy. By the time I had gathered myself together, she had me laughing, which helped me to refocus on another late night of packing. 

Today, Judy drove four hours to come see me. We met at our ‘usual’ spot in Royal Oak and in sharing hugs; I felt all of my stress melt away. Soon we were making each other smile and off for a day of camaraderie.

We sat in her vehicle and I talked…and talked. For beyond the laughter, there are tears over having to move and nowhere to go. 

Later, tucked in my purse, I would find the beautiful heart pendant that she had given me. This stone symbolizes the darkness and light my own fragile heart has felt over the years. What I see is the impression of radiance surrounded by its shape. With everything I have received from Judy, there is always a connection. 

 

Later, we went to our daughter’s favourite place to eat—the local Denny’s.

We snickered at the jumbo size menu that comes with 1,000 menu options, including sending a person into a massive sugar high. When our hot cocoa arrived, there were more chuckles over the sayings on our cups. 

When Judy saw a reindeer mug based on the 1964 cartoon movie: Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer, she had to purchase one. 

After filling ourselves with an overload of calories, we went to the Royal BC Museum. The Mammoth exhibit is on full display and we took some candid shots along the way. 

 

Nice Kitty...

In the Museum gift shop, I discovered a brilliant product that was like holding fake snow in my hand. Judy could see how much this brought joy into my life and happily purchased a package for me to play with later on. 

When we were leaving, located outside are historical buildings. I had my face pressed up against the glass, looking into an era, long gone. Suddenly, I saw a flash of white in the darkness of the room and I let out a scream. Startled, I soon realized it was a security guard, doing his nightly checks.

Judy was in stitches. As usual, I can be her source of entertainment. 

What was remarkable about today’s visit was after we parted our ways; Judy then drove another four hours back to her home, up Island.

It brings me to tears to think of how many people would spend 8 hours- in one day- driving to see someone in need. 

This is when I can honestly say that despite my circumstances, I am richly blessed to have friends in Mission, others in South Carolina, Armstrong, Penticton, Alberta and all over Vancouver Island who remind me that I am not walking this rugged journey alone. 

I also honour Judy for being my Forever Friend, who never brings any judgment upon me; instead she lets me lean on her as a Soul Sister.

While Monday is another celebration between us, for me, having Judy in my life is reason enough to be thankful each and every day! 

 By TL Alton